Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Blank Checks For The Treasury?

"Hey guys, what's happenin'? How're your collective families? Good I hope.'

'Listen. We've kinda stumbled on hard times. I could use some cash to keep my friends afloat. Nothing much. Just 700 billion no strings attached taxpayer dollars should do it."

I don't know about you, but I'm not too keen on this proposed economic bailout. Nearly everything about it smells like eighty-year-old porn star vagina. Treasury Secretary Paulson wants 700 billion no-strings-attached dollars.

And wants it now.

The plan will cost taxpayers an estimated $3,000 apiece. So, what does the average taxpayer get out of this bailout?


If I were Congress, I'd answer Paulson succinctly with two choice words: "Fuck You."

I'm just not into rewarding corporate America for their fuckups by handing them a blank check at taxpayer cost. I could care less about this damned if we do, damned if we don't bullshit. Let the corporations go bankrupt and let the market sort it out, that's what I'm saying.

This idea of handing strange, dishonest people money is something I don't go for. Put it this way: When a homeless dude asks me for CHANGE, I tell him to fuck off. And now I've got the government asking me for 3 fucking grand to bail out a bunch of greedy Wall Street fat cats?

Fuck that and Fuck You, Secretary Paulson.